Riot in my head

Penance

With what ease you let the silence dwell.
With what patience you spend the night.
Not meeting eye to eye holds no guilt and the absence of words holds no urgency.
It was your punishment. I was the inflictor.
It was, after all, your fault. I was, after all, wronged.
I didn’t realize then, but punishing you is futile.
Your punishment leaves a burn on my soul.
It makes me want to gather you in my arms. That is my only healer.
So I pick you up, dust you and take you on my shoulder.

My tear’s your healer. My tear’s your forgiveness.
The inflictor, the inflicted and the guilty are one.

The maddening thought

Envy the hold you have on me.
Perplexed, why I don't own you the same.
Beyond the merry.
Beyond the smiles.
Beyond the show of a perfect life, I worry.
Will he choose another, is not what will slit and ache.
Will she have that enviable hold on him? What if she does

I'm afraid she does.
And that stings.

Own

The courses of true love never did run smooth

Those deep brown eyes,
like the colour of a damp tree bark.

That innocent, moving smile,
like that of a playing child.

Those locks, velvet smooth
and those arms powerful.

None of them I'd love to own.

I'd love to own that heart.
Iron tough.
Stone cold.
Indifferent.
Torn.

When I turn hollow I will fill you up

I've reached the end right now,
This is all i have to put at your feet.
All I could offer I did.
Drained my soul.
Skinned myself.
Turned myself inside out.
But it isn't enough, Is it?

I shall snatch from another and bring it to you.

When I've given all and I'm empty I shall steal for you.

When I turn hollow I will fill you up.

I will give you not only what's mine but what you deserve.

I will bleed myself for you.

and I'm not afraid to kill.

I die each day to keep you alive in me,
to keep you with me.

Yes, I will do what's forbidden.